A Not-So Diesel Rave

Let us begin with the email.

Date: Wed, Oct 21, 2009 at 11:38 AM
Subject: ummmm

You get to hear about this before the masses do:

Diesel is throwing another one of their crazy parties at a secret location, with ONE of MY FAVORITE artists DJing. It's Tuesday, October 27th, but, you WILL NEED a wristband to get in! Go to the UNION SQUARE DIESEL STORE ASAP and ask for MR. BARON and he will give you a wristband. I'm totally serious. First come, first serve.

See you Tuesday. It's gonna be crazy!

Although this email seemed a bit too Gossip Girl for me, Fashionista had reported on this alleged party shortly after I received my email. And if you know me, when Fashionista tells me to do something, I generally listen. My friends and I met at the Diesel store where we scoped out the most friendly looking sales person to ask about the secret party. “Excuse me, Hi! Ummm, I know this sounds completely ridiculous, and I apologize for harassing you while you try to sell glow in the dark denim, but I was told to ask for a Mr. Baron? Do you know anything about this?,” I said.

Before I knew it I was following a trail of confetti down the stairs into a dark room, then through a door that led to THE room. Let me set this up for you: Blaring house music, black lights, posters, glow in the dark paint…and Mr. Baron.

“Welcome.  I am Mr. Baron and this is just a taste of what you will experience next week. There are clues here about the party, but call the number on your wristband on Tuesday to find out the secret location. Be sure to wear your best black light attire. Here is your wristband. Make sure you don’t lose it—it is the only way in,” said a very thin, blond man. 

Did I mention Mr. Baron* was sitting on a chair in the middle of this empty mini rave room? This was the best thing I had experienced in a while and I couldn’t stop laughing. I alerted all of my friends from back home** of the wildness that came with living in New York.

This brings us to the event itself on Tuesday, October 27, 2009.

A lovely rainy day in New York and the last thing I wanted to do was go to this party. There was no way out, I had committed and my friends had already ironed their glow in the dark leotards. I will spare you all the details and get to the point. The party was le terrible***. There was nothing crazy or fun about it. We waited in line in the rain to realize that this was a big fat waste of a $7 cab fare.

The dance floor was packed, but nobody was dancing. They publicized a guest DJ and I expected someone fabulous (MIA and N.E.R.D performed at the party last year). But apparently the recession affected their party budget this year. Spank Rock spun…who? There was only one bar for all 500 guests. People were carrying 6 drinks at a time to avoid facing that line again. They also publicized an open bar all night—I believe open bar means free, so why did they begin charging?

Overall, I believe Diesel got what they wanted to out of the stunt. They drove traffic into their store and created a ton of buzz surrounding their new line. But after a lame no-dance party, don’t expect to see these legs in Diesel jeans any time soon.

*Mr. Baron was a petite man with a platinum blonde bowl cut, leather jacket, wearing wayfarers indoors…in a dark room.
**Home is Ohio. Yes. Ohio. No, I did not grow up on a farm.
*** ‘Le ____’ is a common Lux  Team-ism used by Lux team members at BBC.